Wednesday, February 25, 2009

No apologies or excuses - Day 34

I have been slacking. I missed my workout on Tuesday with my trainer but I did go in and have a really solid workout on my own and did nearly as much as I would have with her. I found I had to up some of my weights again, which is good, and wasn't dying halfway through sets the way I was a month ago, which is another positive which as made me think that I should be doing a positive and negative check-in.


First some updates:

  • Finally got a protein powder and am trying to work it into my 'breakfast.' It is Iso-Gold which apparently is highest protein for lowest calories and no artificial sweeteners (it is sweetened with stevia instead of aspartame)
  • I've lost my mp3 player - again. I hate working out without one.
  • I'm finally starting to get caught up at work.

Cons & Negative stuff going on lately

  • I am not eating what I'm supposed to be eating. I have a fucked up relationship with food. I know this, and it's a huge problem for me. The earlier I start eating in a day, the hungrier I am. The protein powder seems to be helping with this but I'll have to stick with the shakes a little longer to see if it helps overall.
  • I was really counting calories like a maniac for a while and then I suddenly stopped. It makes me feel really out of control to not count. I know that if I'm eating 2/3 of a plate of vegetables and 1/3 of a plate of protein and then a small side of whole grains it is really hard to eat a crazy amount of calories but if I don't keep track of everything I tend to eat a lot of garbage, which brings me to my next point.
  • I've been eating a lot of garbage. I have been exhausted for days and when I'm tired my willpower is absolute crap. This means that if I want chocolate, chocolate it is. I have to figure out how to control this craving = eating what I want thing. I don't know how to do it. I better figure it out quick.
  • I haven't been doing as much cardio as I should. I was doing too much. I was doing 1200 calories worth of cardio 3 + days a week. My trainer gave me hell when I told her I was doing an hour of cardio (which was a gross understatement of the facts) and ranted about needing the energy for my time with her so I started doing less, but less slip slid down to almost none. I need to do more cardio.
  • I've missed my Tuesday appointment with my trainer two weeks running. Both times I have worked out on my own but I don't know if it's the same.
  • I don't feel like I'm getting anything out of my workout. I am pushing and I'm working hard when I'm there but I don't feel it after. I don't get it. I like the ache afterwards, it makes me feel like I've done something... feeling nothing leaves me wondering if I accomplished anything.
  • My trainer does not push me when I want to give up on stuff

Pros & Positivies

  • My trainer has been upping my weights and I didn't notice
  • I'm not thinking I'm going to die halfway through sets
  • I'm starting to see my arms look a little better which is nice.
  • I'm starting to realize that I have a totally skewed and un-objective view of my goals and how my body should be reacting to things
  • I'm giving up processed food for Lent. This, in and of itself, solves a lot of my eating garbage problems. Whole foods are a lot harder to fuck up on and 40 days is long enough to make a positive change.


Goals through to March 5

  1. No more processed food
  2. 4 days of proper cardio
    1. 60 minutes total cardio
    2. > 15 minutes on the cross trainer combo
    3. Treadmill time must be done at > 4.5 mph and > 3.0% incline
  3. Fit in my "no-trainer" workout x 2
    1. Lower body on Saturday
    2. Upper body on Monday

If I meet these goals I'm buying new gym shoes on the 13th.


Feedback, as always, is GREATLY appreciated.


  1. just found your blog. having a trainer is great, i wish i could afford one regularly, instead of off and on.

  2. Well someone's on the road to a great healthily built body. Nice work. :) I wish I had the guts to work out.